The Futility of English
I love English in Japan. Being a native English speaker here, you will encounter enough bizarre phrases to just blow your mind, especially on T-shirts.
Once a week, I take Japanese lessons from this really nice, 25 year old convenience store worker. The lessons were set up by the local international exchange association. They find out who’s interested in learning a language (in my case Japanese) and then search for volunteers to make a match between teacher and student. They’re kind of like a dating service, but substitute possible relationships with failed attempts at learning a language.
My teacher does not really know how to teach Japanese. She looks in a textbook she picked up and arbitrarily picks out a lesson to focus on. She does have some idea how to teach a language, as she studied in college to be an English teacher. I’d normally assume that the main reason she doesn’t have a job as an English teacher is because she doesn’t speak any English, but this is Japan where almost no English teachers speak English, so I’m guessing that’s not it. She admitted that she speaks better Korean than she does English, despite only taking a 6 week, once a week course in Korean yet studying English most of her life. It’s good to see I have any chance of successfully teaching my students.
Our lessons usually consist of her writing Japanese on the board, explaining the grammar points in Japanese, while I nod my head and copy the Japanese down, not having any idea of what is happening. I shouldn’t complain, though, since the lessons are free and she’s quite attractive.
This past lesson, though, I had more difficulty concentrating on not understanding than usual, as I spent the entire our trying to decode her shirt. On the shirt was a cartoon picture of a guy smoking a cigar riding in what looked like a cross between a hot rod and a tractor. Written in large bold letters above the picture were the words “Regnant Loiter!” At first I figured this might be some company name, but looking at the rest of the shirt, I had to conclude that it was just two random words thrown together.
Down the left side of the shirt was written “It is desirable to do an order well to learn things.” Both the bottom and the back contained “Think what as well to be deep on every.” Then, finally, splashed across the front in bold letters was “INSULATE!”
Seriously, here… just what the fuck was that… this goes to show a perfect example of the English ability of the people I teach with… and she’s teaching me…
I realized today that my job has no purpose whatsoever. I’m currently at one of my favorite schools I’ve gone to, where the kids are fun, energetic, and actually motivated to learn English (HOLY SHIT!).
On a random tangent, of the four English teachers, three are batshit insane. The lone male of those three is consistently described by current and former AETs, students, and fellow English teachers as “creepy.” I can do nothing to refute the observation, especially when he randomly touches students. Not sexually mind you, just… touches them. It’s way too weird to even describe. The fourth teacher, though, is one of the best teachers I’ve ever seen, and she more than makes up for the other three (she’s the one I went out with last month. Great girl).
Anyway, so I’m at this school, and it’s the last time I’ll be here until the next school year (the Japanese school year ends in late March and resumes in April). So, you would think that the teachers would make the most of my presence and incorporate me into classes, right? I mean, this is their last opportunity to relieve the tedium in their classroom with an exciting and fun Walrus. Think of what the kids can learn!
Ha Ha! Yeah right. Of the 30 possible class periods I’m at the school, I teach… 8. 8 classes. Plus, I have no ninensei or sannensei, just the ichinensei. So, what do I do during the other 22 class periods? Well, at the moment I’m typing this journal post. I also search the internet and study my Japanese, but mostly just search the internet. So, I sit in the teacher’s room, surrounding by people busy doing work, and I just stare at a computer screen.
And for this they pay me an American equivalent of $34 grand. This is the intelligence and logic found in the educational system of the culture I so diligently studied. I wonder if I wasted my time.
Once a week, I take Japanese lessons from this really nice, 25 year old convenience store worker. The lessons were set up by the local international exchange association. They find out who’s interested in learning a language (in my case Japanese) and then search for volunteers to make a match between teacher and student. They’re kind of like a dating service, but substitute possible relationships with failed attempts at learning a language.
My teacher does not really know how to teach Japanese. She looks in a textbook she picked up and arbitrarily picks out a lesson to focus on. She does have some idea how to teach a language, as she studied in college to be an English teacher. I’d normally assume that the main reason she doesn’t have a job as an English teacher is because she doesn’t speak any English, but this is Japan where almost no English teachers speak English, so I’m guessing that’s not it. She admitted that she speaks better Korean than she does English, despite only taking a 6 week, once a week course in Korean yet studying English most of her life. It’s good to see I have any chance of successfully teaching my students.
Our lessons usually consist of her writing Japanese on the board, explaining the grammar points in Japanese, while I nod my head and copy the Japanese down, not having any idea of what is happening. I shouldn’t complain, though, since the lessons are free and she’s quite attractive.
This past lesson, though, I had more difficulty concentrating on not understanding than usual, as I spent the entire our trying to decode her shirt. On the shirt was a cartoon picture of a guy smoking a cigar riding in what looked like a cross between a hot rod and a tractor. Written in large bold letters above the picture were the words “Regnant Loiter!” At first I figured this might be some company name, but looking at the rest of the shirt, I had to conclude that it was just two random words thrown together.
Down the left side of the shirt was written “It is desirable to do an order well to learn things.” Both the bottom and the back contained “Think what as well to be deep on every.” Then, finally, splashed across the front in bold letters was “INSULATE!”
Seriously, here… just what the fuck was that… this goes to show a perfect example of the English ability of the people I teach with… and she’s teaching me…
I realized today that my job has no purpose whatsoever. I’m currently at one of my favorite schools I’ve gone to, where the kids are fun, energetic, and actually motivated to learn English (HOLY SHIT!).
On a random tangent, of the four English teachers, three are batshit insane. The lone male of those three is consistently described by current and former AETs, students, and fellow English teachers as “creepy.” I can do nothing to refute the observation, especially when he randomly touches students. Not sexually mind you, just… touches them. It’s way too weird to even describe. The fourth teacher, though, is one of the best teachers I’ve ever seen, and she more than makes up for the other three (she’s the one I went out with last month. Great girl).
Anyway, so I’m at this school, and it’s the last time I’ll be here until the next school year (the Japanese school year ends in late March and resumes in April). So, you would think that the teachers would make the most of my presence and incorporate me into classes, right? I mean, this is their last opportunity to relieve the tedium in their classroom with an exciting and fun Walrus. Think of what the kids can learn!
Ha Ha! Yeah right. Of the 30 possible class periods I’m at the school, I teach… 8. 8 classes. Plus, I have no ninensei or sannensei, just the ichinensei. So, what do I do during the other 22 class periods? Well, at the moment I’m typing this journal post. I also search the internet and study my Japanese, but mostly just search the internet. So, I sit in the teacher’s room, surrounding by people busy doing work, and I just stare at a computer screen.
And for this they pay me an American equivalent of $34 grand. This is the intelligence and logic found in the educational system of the culture I so diligently studied. I wonder if I wasted my time.
posted by S A B at 4:00 AM
1 Comments:
"And for this they pay me an American equivalent of $34 grand. This is the intelligence and logic found in the educational system of the culture I so diligently studied. I wonder if I wasted my time."
I get paid about the same to shuffle papers from various locations to the proper folder. I think you'll find this kind of practice in most cultures. It's what meakes the world great!
Or something like that. Or not.
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